Stillness

Meditation has come to have many facets to it, from relaxation, visualisation, breath-work and more. Deep relaxation is a great introduction to meditation and paves the way. I believe after experiencing sessions of relaxation and guided meditation, deeper mental layers need consideration and the most effective way is by being with your inner stillness. We go through this process step by step, flowing with what is needed at the time.

Inner stillness is  often feared and resisted, one of the first stages of coming face to face with your mind is that it pokes at you, pushes you to the edges of your boundaries, it makes you frustrated and irritable. You feel like your mind is going to explode. There’s an amalgamation of thoughts that are battling to come to the forefront. Memories that you didn’t know you even had appear from nowhere.  Conflicts appear within you, a battle commences.

This battle is between your mind and self.  The mind floods with thoughts, feelings, emotions and the self tries to make sense of it all.  Both parts are, in a way, battling it out.  What we need to work on is the witness state, which is the awareness that stands by and watches the mind and self at play with each other.  Developing the awareness or witness state helps to peel the layers and as the layers peel off it leads to a meditative state, connecting with inner stillness, universal consciousness, your higher self, whichever name you choose to call the flow of unconditional love.

Everyone has their own unique experience when meditating but please experience it, give it time. Thoughts, sensations, feelings of differing natures may arise but do not allow this to make you fearful or stop meditating, please continue, as the beauty is intensifying and expanding.

I am happy to connect with you to talk through meditation and offer my humble advice on overcoming some of the obstacles I faced when starting meditation and even further down the line. I believe meditation should be offered and spread worldwide, its benefits are enormous from physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

Visualisation is a powerful tool to connect with your mind, body and spirit. It’s often used for manifestation as described in ‘The Secret’ I also find it a great way to reconnect with our body and shifting energy which may cause blocks and obstacles in our day to day life.

Breath-work is a practice used for eons of time and affects the mind, body, emotions and overall well-being. In Yoga and Chinese practices such as Pranayama, Qi Gong, Tai Chi breathing correctly and fully is the first step in energy healing. Breath is at our finger tips, together we explore and use breath to heal, energize and reconnect with ourselves.

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So Hum

 

Silent whispers
Longing closeness
Feeling strongly
Soul-full flowing

Freely expanding
Swirling twirling
Magic amazing
Feeling becoming

Breath delving
Depths unknown
No longer here
Space unleashed

So hum So hum
So hum so hum

 

 

 

Tender Heart

Love Heart in Sand

My heart once pumping love
Forgets joy withdraws from all
Armouring and building a wall
No-one can enter anymore
The door under lock and key

A ray of light from the sun
Like a bolt penetrating 
The heart centre exploding
Shattering into tiny pieces
Gathering and recollecting

This journey needs to be taken
Each step burning with the rays
Dredging along clearing the path
Unfolding deep soul compassion
Bleeding heart becoming whole

Each piece re-joining tenderly
Energy of love a glue so strong
Holding, caressing, connecting
Eyes brighter with inner light
Heart reigning the mind at last

 

 

Transformation

file0001967383262Some of you will remember the theme song from the popular 90’s sitcom The Fresh Prince of Bel Air with Will Smith’s rap “and my life was turned upside down”, well that’s exactly how I felt in my early twenties. Every part of my life seemed to be falling apart, from my home, which was never a haven for me but a place I dodged emotional bullets, to work, which ended up being my escape and a place to bury my misery and silent cries.  I grew a shield of armour around me and let no one in, friends were never an option, I didn’t want anyone to see my vulnerability.

I lived in a place of fear, misery and frustration of not seeing a way out. My internal screams were bouncing off the walls of my heart. My soul was being ripped inside out. Tears of blood were flowing, I was slowly dying inside, living day to day like a corpse with one word answers or nods of the head to show some sign of life, although it was slowly fading away.

I woke one day with strange sensations in my body, I felt very sick and when I went to the doctors I found out I was pregnant. From that moment it felt like someone had come along and lit a spark in me. Bright eyed and bushy tailed, I was elated in telling everyone I was having not one but two little babies, “its twin girls!” I beamed.

The moment they came into this world and graced me with their presence, a further shift occurred in me. I was no longer feeling sorry for myself with my head down and playing the role of victim. I transformed into a warrior princess, eat your heart out wonder woman, as warrior princess was here to kick some butt!

My girls became my new focus, as a new mum I fumbled with all the newness of sleepless nights, nappy changing and feeding. These two beauties were a gift of hope in the darkness of despair, not one but two lights blessing my life.  As I held their bottles to feed them, rubbed their backs to wind them and bathed their delicate soft baby skin, in each of those moments, I was growing stronger and stronger.  My heart was coming alive, it had a reason to pump and live. My soul was picking up its broken pieces and like a jigsaw puzzle being put together again. My blood tears were now tears of joy, laughter and smiles looking into the eyes of my babies giggling and gurgling they were my biggest teachers in life, they taught me how to live, to sing, to play, to laugh and most importantly to love.

Day by day by resolve strengthened and I was able to turn my life from “upside down” to downside up. I had found my inner warrior princess and fought every obstacle that came my way with fierceness, my samurai sword was out and I was slicing through anyone or anything that stopped me from being happy.

However, the fierceness also had its problems because I had gone from being timid, armoured and in despair to being loud, outspoken and direct, with flames roaring from my mouth burning all in my path, although this helped in the short term but ultimately it would destroy me too. I met many interesting people along the way and my current husband was one of them, I will save that story for another time.  This new found fierceness was also destroying relationships with new found friends and colleagues.

As I was bull dozing along my path creating destruction wherever I went. It dawned on me that maybe just maybe the middle path was for me.  Not the one to the far left that had me crying into the depths of my soul and no action was ever taken and not the path to the far right which led me to dramatic destruction. The optimum choice was the middle path of peace and calm, where I was centered, aligned, not only knowing my truth but living it each and every moment.

Finding my true self, I underwent a process of peeling back the layers and understanding the self, my mind and all its resistance, my body that hid many of my emotions and my soul’s vibration. I developed a system to connect with your inner stillness and that stillness uncovers all that is you and holds the answers to all your questions and dilemmas.  Working with this system you will become your own problem solver, your own guru/teacher and your own counselor.

The system consists of unraveling and deeply connecting with the following:

Mind – understanding your mind, the resistance it puts up, the fears and doubts, the ego and games it plays

Body – releasing the emotions and energy blocks, those backaches, or hip problems that make you hobble along may be energy blocks coming from your mind and emotions

Soul – connecting to your true self, the self that is beyond mind and matter

Awareness – consciousness which witnesses all that is happening and connects to your higher self

Support and guidance connecting you deeper and deeper to your inner self and paving your path to a life filled with joy, bliss, harmony and love.

Enquire further: mannidillon@gmail.com